|
The Urine Sample
One day in line at the company cafeteria, Jack said to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a
doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replied. "There's a diagnostic computer at the corner drugstore. Just
give it a urine sample, and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and only costs
ten dollars. It's a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."
So Jack peed in a jar and took it to the drugstore. He deposited ten dollars in the slot in the computer. It lit up and a little
drawer slid out. The display said, "Please deposit urine sample." Jack poured the urine sample into the drawer and the drawer
slid back in. He waited and fifteen seconds later, the computer ejected a printout:
You have something similar to tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two
weeks.
That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed
some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and masturbated into the mixture for good
measure.
Jack hurried back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He deposited ten dollars into the computer, poured in his
concoction, and awaited the results. The computer ejected a printout:
Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. Your daughter
has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. Your wife is pregnant. Twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't
stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
Next
Back to Favorite Jokes |
